Discipline and Self-Control - LORD, Give Me Strength

Looking back on my 29 years of life, I cannot remember a time when I've had cling so tightly to a promise from God. Everyday, I literally have to remind myself not to give up.

At the beginning of this year, I knew that God was calling me to a deeper place in regards to self-control and discipline, quite possibly my two least favorite words. How could I say I loved God when I was so clearly living in a place of sin? I had never looked at my lack of self-control regarding food/healthy living in that way. Ever. But at the start of this year, it never seemed to make more sense. My body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, and it's the only one I get until that beautiful day when I get to spend eternity with Him. I want to honor Him in every way, including this very difficult area.

So here I am. Almost 9 months later. I have lost 48 pounds, and I have 34 more to go. This summer, while I was still disciplined in many ways, I was spending a lot of time with friends, enjoying the summer, which I think I desperately needed. Anyway, now that school is back in session, and many of my closest friends have moved away, I am ready to hit this self-control/discipline thing hard!

In May 2014, I turn the big 3-0, and I want to have practiced self-control/discipline in all of the areas that I feel like God is leading me to. I am, without question, a list person. I love to cross things off, or make a big red check mark next to an item that I have accomplished. So, I have printed an academic year calendar, and listed the following things that I am so hoping to accomplish within the next 9 months:

1.) Lose 34 more pounds

2.) Continue to eat healthy (no gluten/no sugar/whole foods as much as possible)

3.) Continue to work-out daily - I would love to run a 5K. I have a ways to go!

4.) Spend time with Jesus everyday

5.) Memorize a verse a week - So far, I've memorized Proverbs 19:21; 1 Peter 5:7; Galatians 6:9; and I'm currently working on 2 Samuel 22:31

6.) Read three books per month including a classic, a book of choice, and something to augment my time with Jesus. (I am failing here. Every time I pick up a book, I imagine being back in school - ah!)

7.) Become more focused in my calling - this has been difficult, but I am doing it. I love to be busy, but I felt like God said it was time to scale back in my duties to focus on what He's called me to in this season: worship and deeper relationships with the people He's placed in my life.

8.) Regularly, spend time fasting (this may kill me :)

9.) Save! Save! Save! Now that I'm a grown up with bills and a mortgage, I realize the importance of having a stash of cash in case something happens to my house, car, or job. I thoroughly enjoyed my summer, but I know now I need to utilize some self-control and start stashing some of the hard, earned cash in the 'ole savings account and my piggy bank for the big cross-country the roomies and I are taking in May.

10.) Sleep. This may seem silly, but I have realized the value and importance of rest. We are the most exhausted nation in the world. I'm doing my best to be in bed by 10:30 every week night so that when the alarm goes off at 5:30 a.m. to jog, I don't start praying by saying, "LORD, let this cup be passed from me."

I think it's so important to have goals and to keep pressing forward with them. If we stop growing, we stop living. What goals are you pressing toward? I'd love to hear from you.

P.S. This song has been a constant source of strength when I feel like giving up!

1 Peter 5:7-10 - Cast and Release

So, lately, I've realized that I have wandered far away from some of my hobbies, like writing and reading. And even though blogging has become archaic, replaced with cheap and quick counterparts like Tumblr, Twitter, and even Facebook, I decided to get back to this—not for anyone out there exactly—but for me. This is a good place for me to sort out my thoughts.

About a week and half ago, I was out jogging in the morning, and I was sad. Even though I've been told my entire life that exercise makes you happy because it gives you endorphins, I'm here to tell you that you can exercise and still be sad. There I was, sweating away to a random playlist on my I-Phone, trying to give some things to God, and all I wanted to do was hold on to each and every care. I'm not an emotional person. Ask my friends. I'm a big fan of logic driven decisions, but I'm not going to lie. While I was gasping for air, I wanted to let my emotions run rampant, when I felt like God started speaking 1 Peter 5:7 to me. You have probably heard some version of this verse, "Cast your cares on me, because I care for You." That's what I heard, over and over during my jog.

When I got home, I Googled the reference because I had no idea where the verse was, and I started reading all of 1 Peter 5. That's when I had an epiphany about how simplistic this whole process of casting cares really can be if we don't give up.

Anyway getting back to 1 Peter, I was struck by the juxtaposition of this warm and fuzzy verse of comfort right next to a verse of caution. Immediately after we give our cares to God, Peter emphasizes how important it is that we be on guard against the attacks of the enemy. So often, when I give my cares to God, I do one of two things. First, I either take the care back immediately, so I can begin to worry about it, or, I forget about it completely. I'm really good at divorcing myself from difficult situations, because it's an easy way to cope. But I don't think either of these solutions is what Peter was talking about. He tells us to cast our cares on God, and to be looking out for the devil who prowls like a lion. It doesn't take long to be devoured by worry, fear, and anxiety. Trust me. I know.

It's easy to give our cares to God, but it's not so easy to follow through. We have a responsibility to take action. First, we give our cares to God, but then, it's our job to stand firm on the promises of God regarding those cares. What has God spoken over my life? The lives of my family? What does He say in the Bible? Am I burying my head in the sand because it's too painful to deal with or am I constantly worrying about the difficulties of this life? The truth of the matter is that I don't have to do either. If I remember to cast my cares on to God and I persistently believe and hold fast to the promises of God, then His promise in 1 Peter 5 will come to pass: "... he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation." 

Take time today to find a promise in the Bible to memorize and cling to. It's not difficult to do. The first one I found was in Proverbs 19:21, which basically says, you can make all the plans that you want, but the LORD's purposes will prevail. Go ahead. You can borrow this one.

I was talking to my good friend about the question that trips so many people up: why doesn't God stop bad things from happening to people? We all have our answer to this question. Free will, blah, blah, blah. But in that conversation I said that I wish I had all the answers, but I don't. I only know that the truth of God's word is what I have to hold on to. And in these coming months, while I find myself in a season of waiting, I'm going to be holding on to the promises that God has made to me.